By: Kelsey Wooten, LPC
*Trigger warning: suicide
I recently watched A Star is Born with Lady Gaga (Ally) and Bradly Cooper (Jack). If you haven’t seen it, or it’s been awhile I would encourage you to grab some popcorn and watch. The actors do an incredible job of playing such complicated characters. The two also co-wrote all the music and scored the film, which won multiple awards. [SPOILER ALERT] At the end of the movie Cooper’s character dies by suicide. While initially I was shocked – upon a second watch I realized how many red flags we missed.
- History of attempt – while in rehab Jack tells his therapist about his first attempt when he was 12, and he dies in the same way.
- Childhood trauma – Jack and his brother Bobby lived on a pecan farm with their father who was an alcoholic. While they give vague descriptions the two men mention that they had to take care of the farm and each other, both while their father was alive and after he died when Jack was 13. In the film Bobby also mentions that Jack would be “drinking buddies” with his father.
- Substance use – Jack is an alcoholic, like his father. Throughout the film we also see him beginning to use pills, mixing the two together, and increasing use. Which is dangerous and causes overdose.
- Loss of support – At one point Bobby and Jack get into a fight, and Bobby walks away from being the manager. While Bobby does eventually come back around, Jack spends a lot of time being belligerent and not having someone to take care of him. Ally is also in and out as she is also writing and touring
- Suicide note – In the film Ally finds a song that Jack wrote. When she asks him about it, he says that he hoped it would find her someday (suicide note). There is a moment where things feel heavy, but they choose to move on and not address it. It is the eulogy song at the end of the film. If you ever have a hunch someone you love is struggling ASK.
- Hearing issues – Jack slowly loses his hearing in the film and chooses not to adhere to medical advice about using an earpiece while on stage. This causes him to struggle to hear himself playing, and communicate with other people, making him feel isolated
- Age and race – middle aged white men are the group that have the highest risk for suicide
Jack and Ally’s relationship is unhealthy / toxic. While in the beginning we see them falling in love, overtime Jack’s drinking causes him to say and do hurtful things, which in turn causes her to react. We see Ally constantly worry about Jack’s wellbeing by asking people to go check on him and wanting him to go on tour with her to make sure he’s safe. To the point where it begins to jeopardize her career. Often times being in a relationship with an addict causes codependency.
While this is a film and the characters aren’t real, suicide in the U.S is very real. In 2020 there were 45,979 people who died by suicide.
Other signs of suicide include:
– withdrawing or isolating
– change in sleep (more or less)
– giving away their things
– saying goodbye
– talking about death or suicide
– severe change in mood and behavior
– sudden relief or improvement
Lastly a note on substance use after rehab – when someone uses or is addicted to a substance their body builds a tolerance over time. When someone goes to rehab or abstains from use for some time their tolerance decreases. If a relapse happens often that person will use the same amount they did before, which can be dangerous or even fatal.
If you or someone you know is in crisis please call 988 or go to the nearest emergency room.