By: Kelsey Wooten, LPC
At the end of the intake session I always ask clients “what goals would you like to set for yourself?” Usually there is some form of “I want to change ____ or I want to start doing ____.” This helps me know where you would like to go and how I can help.
Having a direction of where you want to go is a good first step in the process of change. The second thing we want to look at is where you are at in the stages of change. While this model was created for substance use it also works in other areas of change.
Pre-contemplation – not thinking of quitting or changing
Contemplation – thinking about change or how substance might be a problem, but not ready to change
Preparation – we are preparing for change by making a plan, perhaps ‘cut back’ on substances, and can see how change would be beneficial
Action – we are putting the plan into action weather it is stopping the substance use, waking up and working out, you are using your coping skills and working through triggers and using your support system
Maintenance – the change has been sustained
Relapse – relapse happens, it’s just part of the process. The good news is that you don’t HAVE to start all the way at the beginning. Pull from your experience before, see where your action plan failed and try again!
Once we identify the stage of change you are in, we will work from there. Everyone starts in a different place, depending on the change they want to make and circumstances surrounding it. You may find that you bounce between wanting to make a change and not wanting to. This is normal in the process of change.
The work we do usually includes discussing fears or reservations around change, processing the grief around giving up the substance or habit, learning to name and tolerate emotions, identifying triggers, increasing coping skills, identifying who your supports are and areas that need other changes (such as stopping or limiting interaction with certain people, places, and things).
Change is really hard. You’ll have to start over a lot. THAT’S OKAY, you’re still learning every time you try. Our brains don’t like change – that doesn’t mean that you can’t. Give yourself the chance to change and improve your wellbeing. You deserve it.